[CLOSED] The Great-Big Event Post - JOKE EDITION!

Sayu wrote:

Ten Top Reasons Computers Are Male

10. They have a lot of data but are still clueless.
9. A better model is always just around the corner.
8. They look nice and shiny, until you bring them home.
7. It is always necessary to have a backup.
6. They'll do whatever you say, if you push the right buttons.
5. The best part of having either one is the games you can play.
4. In order to get their attention, you have to turn them on.
3. The lights are on but nobody's home.
2. Big power surges knock them out for the night.
1. Size does matter.

I love you.

EDIT BECAUSE Gender War

-Angelo

Gender War.....

Gnawid, I'm pretty sure you aren't gonna win the event like that.

also

Dependence wrote:

Sayu wrote:

Ten Top Reasons Computers Are Male

10. They have a lot of data but are still clueless.
9. A better model is always just around the corner.
8. They look nice and shiny, until you bring them home.
7. It is always necessary to have a backup.
6. They'll do whatever you say, if you push the right buttons.
5. The best part of having either one is the games you can play.
4. In order to get their attention, you have to turn them on.
3. The lights are on but nobody's home.
2. Big power surges knock them out for the night.
1. Size does matter.

I love you.

;-;

Gnawid theres no need to start a gender war. I myself find that joke funny and seriously theres no way the guild full of guys are going to vote for 10 reasons computers are male lol. Just some harmless fun.

o_O I thought we were having fun with the gender war. It was always a great ice-breaker in my previous guilds; guess not here D:

Sorry if I offended anyone with the post :X

gnawid wrote:

o_O I thought we were having fun with the gender war. It was always a great ice-breaker in my previous guilds; guess not here D:

Sorry if I offended anyone with the post :X

I just wanted to stop something before it started, its fine.

I honestly found them to be bit funny as well but better safe than sorry, yes?

Come on now everyone, give us some feedback! I can't make an unbiased poll unless you tell me 1 person you think should win. And before you do it, no: you cannot nominate yourself.

Dependence wrote:

I honestly found them to be bit funny as well but better safe than sorry, yes?

Come on now everyone, give us some feedback! I can't make an unbiased poll unless you tell me 1 person you think should win. And before you do it, no: you cannot nominate yourself.

Are you going to cast a poll on a different post or do we tell you our votes on here?
I like to cast my vote for angelo's superman joke.

I second that. Superman joke Ftw.

I'll have the poll here.

Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy takes out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps: "My friend is dead! What can I do?" The operator says: "Calm down, I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then a gunshot is heard. Back on the phone, the guy says: "OK, now what?"

I vote for Gnaw's gummy bear joke.

Pomanico wrote:

Hear about the flasher who was thinking about retiring?
He decided to stick it out a little longer.

This morning I woke up, went for a piss and got out of bed.
Something went wrong there.

I'm putting my vote for these.

Now for my jokes.
Disclaimer: Some may be taken negatively. Please, avoid negative thought!

1: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree?

A: Because, it was dead!

2: What's big, black and carries seamen?

A: A Submarine!

3: A guy writes on his facebook status: "My Daily Routine:1. Eating 2.Sleeping 3. Hand exercises."

:3 don't know if those were any good ,but thank you once again =D

Dakutsuki wrote:

So my wife was nagging me about a gift for our Anaversury. She said she wanted something shiny that went from 0-200 in 3 seconds flat... so I bought her a scale... then the fight started >_>

^ My vote goes to this one!

Sayu wrote:

A guy needed a horse, so he went to a temple and got one. Before he left, the priest told him that it was a special horse. In order for it to go, you said 'thank god' and for it to stop you said 'amen'. So the guy went, and a few minutes later he dozed off on his horse.
A few hours later, he woke up and was going off the edge of a cliff. So he shouted 'Amen!' and the horse stopped a few inches from the edge...
'Whew,' he said. 'Thank god.'

lol this is funny

Sayu wrote:

A guy needed a horse, so he went to a temple and got one. Before he left, the priest told him that it was a special horse. In order for it to go, you said 'thank god' and for it to stop you said 'amen'. So the guy went, and a few minutes later he dozed off on his horse.
A few hours later, he woke up and was going off the edge of a cliff. So he shouted 'Amen!' and the horse stopped a few inches from the edge...
'Whew,' he said. 'Thank god.'


Ten Top Reasons Computers Are Male

10. They have a lot of data but are still clueless.
9. A better model is always just around the corner.
8. They look nice and shiny, until you bring them home.
7. It is always necessary to have a backup.
6. They'll do whatever you say, if you push the right buttons.
5. The best part of having either one is the games you can play.
4. In order to get their attention, you have to turn them on.
3. The lights are on but nobody's home.
2. Big power surges knock them out for the night.
1. Size does matter.

Okay, these two should really be on the top, they are funny not lame and I really did laugh:P

Ok everyone, the event is almost over! You have but one more day to submit any last-minuet jokes you may have. The polls will open tomarrow... whenever I get on... :>

EDIT///

The poll has opened and can be found on the openin post in this thread. Place your votes before Sunday, May 8th.